Dear Tiny,
What the heck are we going to name you?!
Love,
Mama
7/30/12
Dear Tiny,
A few weeks after you're likely to be born, there will be a presidential election. Normally you're supposed to go into the voting booth alone, but I wonder if they'll let you come with me, especially if you're in a little baby sling!
Politics is a tricky thing. There's a lot of noise out there and sometimes it seems like people take any chance they can to cut people down. It's a nasty business that, frankly, is totally tiring to read about on places like Facebook and other social media platforms, regardless of whether it's pro-Republican or pro-Democrat.
Dad and I read a bit about politics, but mostly I vote with my heart. I vote for people whose characters most closely represent my own beliefs. I vote when I am compelled by someone's opinion or when I'm impressed with someone for bravely standing up for something I believe in. Personally I have no idea financially whether I'd be Republican or Democrat... because the truth is that the most important thing to me (above money, above all that other jazz) is society and how we create community. For that reason, I'll always vote for the candidate that is most socially aligned with what I believe our country should be.
You'll have to decide what values you bring into the voting booth with you one day. They might not line up with my own values and that's fine. Don't let others persuade you; so long as you're voting with your conscience, you're doing alright.
Love,
Mama
A few weeks after you're likely to be born, there will be a presidential election. Normally you're supposed to go into the voting booth alone, but I wonder if they'll let you come with me, especially if you're in a little baby sling!
Politics is a tricky thing. There's a lot of noise out there and sometimes it seems like people take any chance they can to cut people down. It's a nasty business that, frankly, is totally tiring to read about on places like Facebook and other social media platforms, regardless of whether it's pro-Republican or pro-Democrat.
Dad and I read a bit about politics, but mostly I vote with my heart. I vote for people whose characters most closely represent my own beliefs. I vote when I am compelled by someone's opinion or when I'm impressed with someone for bravely standing up for something I believe in. Personally I have no idea financially whether I'd be Republican or Democrat... because the truth is that the most important thing to me (above money, above all that other jazz) is society and how we create community. For that reason, I'll always vote for the candidate that is most socially aligned with what I believe our country should be.
You'll have to decide what values you bring into the voting booth with you one day. They might not line up with my own values and that's fine. Don't let others persuade you; so long as you're voting with your conscience, you're doing alright.
Love,
Mama
7/29/12
Dear Tiny,
When you want to give birth at the Birthing Center at St. Luke's hospital, you're required to take a couple of classes. So this morning, Dad and I went into Manhattan to learn all about the procedures in the Birthing Center and to get a tour of the physical space where we will meet you for the first time.
There were lots of other expecting parents there, all of them due around the same time as us. In fact there was another couple due with a little boy on your due date! We joked that we might see them in the Center on the 11th... that would be crazy.
Tiny, it was so, so crazy to visit the three rooms in the Center. Unless something weird happens, we will be meeting you in one of those three places! They each have a giant bathtub and lots of good labor stuff (like a ball and a big wedge pillow and rocking chair). It's very private and only three families can be in labor on the Center at the same time. Hopefully it won't be full the night you decide to make your appearance, but if it is we'll just go upstairs to the Labor and Delivery floor.
To be honest, it was also kind of intimidating to walk into those rooms. I'm very aware of the big job that lies ahead of me and the strength it will take to get you out here. I felt a little nervous about it. Maybe one day you'll decide to run a marathon and will have similar feelings on seeing the course for the first time. Preparation is the best way to give yourself a strong shot at doing well... and yet there's a limit to the amount you can seriously prepare.
One of my books says to visualize the labor experience. I know Dad will be there and hopefully Aunt Kate too. I know I will need to trust them to help me through it and I'm very happy to have the support. Hopefully we'll get you out here with minimum interventions and just let nature take its course... and then we'll snuggle you for a long time!
Love,
Mama
When you want to give birth at the Birthing Center at St. Luke's hospital, you're required to take a couple of classes. So this morning, Dad and I went into Manhattan to learn all about the procedures in the Birthing Center and to get a tour of the physical space where we will meet you for the first time.
There were lots of other expecting parents there, all of them due around the same time as us. In fact there was another couple due with a little boy on your due date! We joked that we might see them in the Center on the 11th... that would be crazy.
Tiny, it was so, so crazy to visit the three rooms in the Center. Unless something weird happens, we will be meeting you in one of those three places! They each have a giant bathtub and lots of good labor stuff (like a ball and a big wedge pillow and rocking chair). It's very private and only three families can be in labor on the Center at the same time. Hopefully it won't be full the night you decide to make your appearance, but if it is we'll just go upstairs to the Labor and Delivery floor.
To be honest, it was also kind of intimidating to walk into those rooms. I'm very aware of the big job that lies ahead of me and the strength it will take to get you out here. I felt a little nervous about it. Maybe one day you'll decide to run a marathon and will have similar feelings on seeing the course for the first time. Preparation is the best way to give yourself a strong shot at doing well... and yet there's a limit to the amount you can seriously prepare.
One of my books says to visualize the labor experience. I know Dad will be there and hopefully Aunt Kate too. I know I will need to trust them to help me through it and I'm very happy to have the support. Hopefully we'll get you out here with minimum interventions and just let nature take its course... and then we'll snuggle you for a long time!
Love,
Mama
7/28/12
Dear Tiny,
Our friends Courtney and Doug are moving and we volunteered to watch their little boy, Jackson, for a few hours this weekend to give them some time for packing. This morning I did a little searching for things to do with him in Brooklyn and it made me really excited to have a kid here! I especially can't wait to bring you to the library. My parents took us to the library all the time when we were little... and the Summer Reading program was one of my favorite things EVER.
I secretly hope it will be one of yours too!
Love,
Mama
Our friends Courtney and Doug are moving and we volunteered to watch their little boy, Jackson, for a few hours this weekend to give them some time for packing. This morning I did a little searching for things to do with him in Brooklyn and it made me really excited to have a kid here! I especially can't wait to bring you to the library. My parents took us to the library all the time when we were little... and the Summer Reading program was one of my favorite things EVER.
I secretly hope it will be one of yours too!
Love,
Mama
7/27/12
Dear Tiny,
Tonight the Olympics started! Dad and I watched the opening ceremonies (which were pretty long, to be honest...) This year they're taking place in London and I get nostalgic for my British friends just seeing the footage of the city. One day we'll take you there!
I'd be surprised if you end up wanting to become an expert athlete in one sport or another because, frankly, that's not our style. Dad and I were just talking last night about how he feels less of an expert in one vertical and more interested in the whole picture (especially when it comes to software). Obviously I feel the same way about my career. Jack of all trades, master of none... this seems to be my MO.
If you decide you're obsessed with being a swimmer and need to go to swimming practice every day for 18 years so you can compete in the Olympics, we'll get you a pool pass and cheer you on at the races. But even if you don't, that is AOK by us. We'll watch the Olympics together on the couch!
Love,
Mama
Tonight the Olympics started! Dad and I watched the opening ceremonies (which were pretty long, to be honest...) This year they're taking place in London and I get nostalgic for my British friends just seeing the footage of the city. One day we'll take you there!
I'd be surprised if you end up wanting to become an expert athlete in one sport or another because, frankly, that's not our style. Dad and I were just talking last night about how he feels less of an expert in one vertical and more interested in the whole picture (especially when it comes to software). Obviously I feel the same way about my career. Jack of all trades, master of none... this seems to be my MO.
If you decide you're obsessed with being a swimmer and need to go to swimming practice every day for 18 years so you can compete in the Olympics, we'll get you a pool pass and cheer you on at the races. But even if you don't, that is AOK by us. We'll watch the Olympics together on the couch!
Love,
Mama
7/26/12
Dear Tiny,
When I was a kid we had a pet rabbit. Every weekend, we would have to clean her pen, which consisted of carrying a very heavy tray of piss-soaked newspaper out to the compost heap. Sometimes Pop-pop would carry it for us if it was really heavy. If it was your turn to clean the pen, you would get a stick, peel all the newspaper off the tray, spray it down with a hose, and then put fresh newspaper in it. (Then you'd get excited because you were off the hook for next time...)
I was thinking about what your pet responsibilities will be as you grow up. We have two cats now and we'd like to get a dog later on when we have more space. Maybe we'll get you helping with the litter box when you're old enough... it seems like a simple enough task for a little kid (and it's secretly the thing that Dad and I hate doing!). Dad has been handling all litter duties while I'm pregnant... he's a saint!
Love,
Mama
When I was a kid we had a pet rabbit. Every weekend, we would have to clean her pen, which consisted of carrying a very heavy tray of piss-soaked newspaper out to the compost heap. Sometimes Pop-pop would carry it for us if it was really heavy. If it was your turn to clean the pen, you would get a stick, peel all the newspaper off the tray, spray it down with a hose, and then put fresh newspaper in it. (Then you'd get excited because you were off the hook for next time...)
I was thinking about what your pet responsibilities will be as you grow up. We have two cats now and we'd like to get a dog later on when we have more space. Maybe we'll get you helping with the litter box when you're old enough... it seems like a simple enough task for a little kid (and it's secretly the thing that Dad and I hate doing!). Dad has been handling all litter duties while I'm pregnant... he's a saint!
Love,
Mama
7/25/12
Dear Tiny,
We had a midwife appointment this morning and your home (aka the old uterus) is measuring a week ahead of schedule. Are you planning an early arrival?
Your heartbeat was normal, in the 140s, and the midwife said she thought that your head was down and your butt was up, but that it's hard to tell at this point because your head and butt are the same size! That seems like a weird metric to think about. She also said that as your head gets bigger, the weight of it should flip you upside down in the womb. So weird.
I'm glad you're having a good time in there, flipping and whatnot. I am considering buying one of those baby-nose-cleaning-bulbs to use on my own face. This cold is the worst!
Love,
Mama
We had a midwife appointment this morning and your home (aka the old uterus) is measuring a week ahead of schedule. Are you planning an early arrival?
Your heartbeat was normal, in the 140s, and the midwife said she thought that your head was down and your butt was up, but that it's hard to tell at this point because your head and butt are the same size! That seems like a weird metric to think about. She also said that as your head gets bigger, the weight of it should flip you upside down in the womb. So weird.
I'm glad you're having a good time in there, flipping and whatnot. I am considering buying one of those baby-nose-cleaning-bulbs to use on my own face. This cold is the worst!
Love,
Mama
7/24/12
Dear Tiny,
I seem to have gotten a bad head cold from our trip to Baltimore. Can I tell you what's worse than being pregnant in July? Being SNIFFLY on top of everything and not being able to take any medication. Ug!
I've been trying to drink lots of water though, something you always appreciate. You're very active when I'm downing water by the glass. At least one of us is enjoying the fluids!
Love,
Mama
P.S. Oscar is sitting on my lap as I type this and you are kicking him! I don't think he realizes that a future buddy is a mere belly away... do you, I wonder?
I seem to have gotten a bad head cold from our trip to Baltimore. Can I tell you what's worse than being pregnant in July? Being SNIFFLY on top of everything and not being able to take any medication. Ug!
I've been trying to drink lots of water though, something you always appreciate. You're very active when I'm downing water by the glass. At least one of us is enjoying the fluids!
Love,
Mama
P.S. Oscar is sitting on my lap as I type this and you are kicking him! I don't think he realizes that a future buddy is a mere belly away... do you, I wonder?
7/23/12
Dear Tiny,
I've been having the weirdest feeling the past two days. I feel like I'm very close to discovering your name.
Yesterday Dad and I went to an art museum in Baltimore (the Visionary Art Museum) and I felt very inspired and excited as we walked through the exhibits. I found myself paying close attention to the artists' names and the male names we encountered... I felt as though your name was about to be stumbled on.
Then today I felt the same way, as if anything I read or heard or talked to people about was going to reveal the perfect name for you. It's hard to explain, but it feels close.
Dad and I have a few names that we both like decently enough, but we haven't found THE name yet. I suppose one of our names could become THE name, but neither of us are convinced just yet. If you have a name preference, try to let me know! Maybe furious kicking or something when I'm encountering the name you'd like to be called. You know, something not-so-subtle.
Love,
Mama
I've been having the weirdest feeling the past two days. I feel like I'm very close to discovering your name.
Yesterday Dad and I went to an art museum in Baltimore (the Visionary Art Museum) and I felt very inspired and excited as we walked through the exhibits. I found myself paying close attention to the artists' names and the male names we encountered... I felt as though your name was about to be stumbled on.
Then today I felt the same way, as if anything I read or heard or talked to people about was going to reveal the perfect name for you. It's hard to explain, but it feels close.
Dad and I have a few names that we both like decently enough, but we haven't found THE name yet. I suppose one of our names could become THE name, but neither of us are convinced just yet. If you have a name preference, try to let me know! Maybe furious kicking or something when I'm encountering the name you'd like to be called. You know, something not-so-subtle.
Love,
Mama
7/22/12
Dear Tiny,
Phew! We made it back to Brooklyn tonight and we are tuckered out. We had such a great time seeing everyone. Uncle Steve's band played yesterday at the family reunion and you enjoyed the live music... you were kicking up a storm. I kept thinking about how much you might like the live music once you're on the outside too. I can vaguely picture you as a little boy dancing while his uncle's band plays a set.
I find myself noticing families more often lately. Today on the train ride home there was a mom and dad and little girl behind us. The mom held the little girl for a few hours while she slept and then she transferred her to her dad's lap for a while. We are going to have such different travel experiences pretty soon. I'm hopeful that you'll be a good little traveler so we can take lots of plane rides, but I definitely think we can handle the train.
That's good news because that means you'll get to visit Nana and Pop-pop up in Yorktown AND Uncle Steve down in Washington, DC! Maybe if you're lucky we'll get you a conductor's hat for those train trips. That would be pretty cute!
Love,
Mama
Phew! We made it back to Brooklyn tonight and we are tuckered out. We had such a great time seeing everyone. Uncle Steve's band played yesterday at the family reunion and you enjoyed the live music... you were kicking up a storm. I kept thinking about how much you might like the live music once you're on the outside too. I can vaguely picture you as a little boy dancing while his uncle's band plays a set.
I find myself noticing families more often lately. Today on the train ride home there was a mom and dad and little girl behind us. The mom held the little girl for a few hours while she slept and then she transferred her to her dad's lap for a while. We are going to have such different travel experiences pretty soon. I'm hopeful that you'll be a good little traveler so we can take lots of plane rides, but I definitely think we can handle the train.
That's good news because that means you'll get to visit Nana and Pop-pop up in Yorktown AND Uncle Steve down in Washington, DC! Maybe if you're lucky we'll get you a conductor's hat for those train trips. That would be pretty cute!
Love,
Mama
7/21/12
Dear Tiny,
The family weekend continued today, as we had a family reunion with Pop-pop's side of the family. We met Pop-pop's cousins and I asked them each what they remembered about my Grandma Madelyn (your great-grandma). They remembered that she was kind and used to give them popsicles. Some of them visited her in the hospital, where she lived for a long time. I only remember her living in a hospital, in fact.
Family is a funny thing. You don't choose them; they come as part of your heritage. There will inevitably be family members that you're closer to than others... remember that it's important to know a little something about everyone you come from. Even though I didn't have a close relationship with my Grandma Madelyn, she's a part of my history and I can appreciate that. In fact, one of Dad's cousins apparently looks just like me! That was a funny thing to think about, an entire wing of the family who might have my features... and maybe yours too?!
Love,
Mama
The family weekend continued today, as we had a family reunion with Pop-pop's side of the family. We met Pop-pop's cousins and I asked them each what they remembered about my Grandma Madelyn (your great-grandma). They remembered that she was kind and used to give them popsicles. Some of them visited her in the hospital, where she lived for a long time. I only remember her living in a hospital, in fact.
Family is a funny thing. You don't choose them; they come as part of your heritage. There will inevitably be family members that you're closer to than others... remember that it's important to know a little something about everyone you come from. Even though I didn't have a close relationship with my Grandma Madelyn, she's a part of my history and I can appreciate that. In fact, one of Dad's cousins apparently looks just like me! That was a funny thing to think about, an entire wing of the family who might have my features... and maybe yours too?!
Love,
Mama
7/20/12
Dear Tiny,
Today during Aunt Kate's graduation we heard a woman speak about her role in healthcare. She's a nurse practitioner, but has also worked in the Senate and has started a number of community clinics and programs to help people. She was really inspiring, especially when she talked about Aunt Kate's class being the first batch of nurses who will spend their entire careers in a system that provides basic healthcare to all Americans. She got a big round of applause for that!
You'll grow up with plenty of nurses in your life, bud. On my side, Aunt Kate and Nana are both nurses and your Grandpa on your Dad's side is a nurse too! Lots of people who care about helping others...
Love,
Mama
Today during Aunt Kate's graduation we heard a woman speak about her role in healthcare. She's a nurse practitioner, but has also worked in the Senate and has started a number of community clinics and programs to help people. She was really inspiring, especially when she talked about Aunt Kate's class being the first batch of nurses who will spend their entire careers in a system that provides basic healthcare to all Americans. She got a big round of applause for that!
You'll grow up with plenty of nurses in your life, bud. On my side, Aunt Kate and Nana are both nurses and your Grandpa on your Dad's side is a nurse too! Lots of people who care about helping others...
Love,
Mama
7/19/12
Dear Tiny,
Tonight you and I took the train down to Baltimore. Aunt Katie graduates from nursing school tomorrow and we're here to celebrate with her!
We met Uncle Steve at the station and waited on line for a taxi. It was raining SO HARD! Uncle Steve and I were soaking wet by the time we made it to dinner. I told him that I was glad you were inside my belly and not in a stroller. I think you would have been scared by the thunder and the lighting!
Isn't it funny that you're all wet all day long, swimming around in my belly?
Love,
Mama
Tonight you and I took the train down to Baltimore. Aunt Katie graduates from nursing school tomorrow and we're here to celebrate with her!
We met Uncle Steve at the station and waited on line for a taxi. It was raining SO HARD! Uncle Steve and I were soaking wet by the time we made it to dinner. I told him that I was glad you were inside my belly and not in a stroller. I think you would have been scared by the thunder and the lighting!
Isn't it funny that you're all wet all day long, swimming around in my belly?
Love,
Mama
7/18/12
Dear Tiny,
Tonight my friend Sarah felt you kick while we were standing outside the subway in Union Square and she started crying. You're a lady killer already!
Love,
Mama
Tonight my friend Sarah felt you kick while we were standing outside the subway in Union Square and she started crying. You're a lady killer already!
Love,
Mama
7/17/12
Dear Tiny,
Tonight Dad and I were at our birthing class and the teacher was talking about how much babies know about what's going on outside the womb. Dad and I thought that some of what she was saying was bogus (for example, you cannot HEAR what is happening out here until you have EARS...), but I am willing to concede that you are definitely affected in positive or negative ways depending on how I'm feeling. More endorphins in me mean more endorphins in you; that seems clear.
As I sat there in class I thought about how happy things have been the past few months, how relaxed I've been and how often we've opted to stay here in Brooklyn instead of running around like crazy people on the weekends. I'm happy that we've been able to keep things light, especially if that means that you're benefiting from our lack of stress!
Love,
Mama
Tonight Dad and I were at our birthing class and the teacher was talking about how much babies know about what's going on outside the womb. Dad and I thought that some of what she was saying was bogus (for example, you cannot HEAR what is happening out here until you have EARS...), but I am willing to concede that you are definitely affected in positive or negative ways depending on how I'm feeling. More endorphins in me mean more endorphins in you; that seems clear.
As I sat there in class I thought about how happy things have been the past few months, how relaxed I've been and how often we've opted to stay here in Brooklyn instead of running around like crazy people on the weekends. I'm happy that we've been able to keep things light, especially if that means that you're benefiting from our lack of stress!
Love,
Mama
7/16/12
Dear Tiny,
Here are some of the things that you seem to like best so far:
Here are some of the things that you seem to like best so far:
- when I eat fruit
- when I lay on my side/stomach propped up on a pillow
- Journey songs
- when I drink lots of water
Love,
Mama
7/15/12
Dear Tiny,
I'm 31 years old and I've done many things so far in my life. But I don't mean to give the impression that I have things all figured out. Life, to me, is a long project during which sometimes you're doing great and sometimes you're a little bit lost. Keep this in mind as you grow up and encounter hurdles and successes, ok?
For example, tonight over dinner I talked to Dad about how I would like to demand more from people in my life. Or, at least, to be better at confronting situations or people when things risk being slightly awkward. I don't think I'm so good at that, but it's something I'm working on.
When I think about your life, it's so untarnished. You don't have a history of anything. No baggage. No influence yet. You haven't been inspired or stunted or shoved in a corner or given a spotlight to shine.
It will be impossible to avoid becoming a sum of your experiences, but I see hope when I think about you and your life. I'm hopeful that I can encourage you to be better than I am in many ways and to make your own mistakes. I promise to try to use my 31 years as neutrally as I can when raising you so that you can grow up to form your own opinions about the world. In fact I cannot even wait until you come home and tell me and Dad that you want to learn Vietnamese! Or become a polar bear trainer! I find it fascinating that you may emerge as an individual who is really different from your parents.
Love,
Mama
I'm 31 years old and I've done many things so far in my life. But I don't mean to give the impression that I have things all figured out. Life, to me, is a long project during which sometimes you're doing great and sometimes you're a little bit lost. Keep this in mind as you grow up and encounter hurdles and successes, ok?
For example, tonight over dinner I talked to Dad about how I would like to demand more from people in my life. Or, at least, to be better at confronting situations or people when things risk being slightly awkward. I don't think I'm so good at that, but it's something I'm working on.
When I think about your life, it's so untarnished. You don't have a history of anything. No baggage. No influence yet. You haven't been inspired or stunted or shoved in a corner or given a spotlight to shine.
It will be impossible to avoid becoming a sum of your experiences, but I see hope when I think about you and your life. I'm hopeful that I can encourage you to be better than I am in many ways and to make your own mistakes. I promise to try to use my 31 years as neutrally as I can when raising you so that you can grow up to form your own opinions about the world. In fact I cannot even wait until you come home and tell me and Dad that you want to learn Vietnamese! Or become a polar bear trainer! I find it fascinating that you may emerge as an individual who is really different from your parents.
Love,
Mama
7/14/12
Dear Tiny,
Earlier I was looking through my Life List and thinking about the kinds of things that are on it. I've accomplished a few of them recently and was writing about that. I started thinking about what your Life List might look like one day. I have no idea who you'll be, but here's a mini list for your first few months of life - things that will make you feel accomplished and things that we wouldn't mind too much either...
Earlier I was looking through my Life List and thinking about the kinds of things that are on it. I've accomplished a few of them recently and was writing about that. I started thinking about what your Life List might look like one day. I have no idea who you'll be, but here's a mini list for your first few months of life - things that will make you feel accomplished and things that we wouldn't mind too much either...
- Enjoy sleeping all night long.
- Learn to smile. Use this skill on your parents all the time (If you don't accomplish #1, I think you will want to accomplish #2 post haste!).
- Be game for whatever comes your way. (Let others hold you, be chill about traveling, eat like a champ from a bottle if Mom's not around.)
- Have a favorite activity. (Bathtime? Swingtime? Walk in a carrier or stroller? Find something you love... so that we can capitalize when you're not in a great mood.)
- Look super-cute. (When all else fails, this is your get-out-of-jail-free card, kid.)
Love,
Mama
7/13/12
Dear Tiny,
Sometimes when I'm on the subway and I'm near a baby who is not behaving, I put my hands on my belly as if to cover your ears.
Don't be influenced!
Love,
Mama
Sometimes when I'm on the subway and I'm near a baby who is not behaving, I put my hands on my belly as if to cover your ears.
Don't be influenced!
Love,
Mama
7/12/12
Dear Tiny,
I’ve known your Mama since I was just a baby and she was two
years old. That’s longer than almost everyone! One day I’ll tell you what your
Mama was like before you met her. I’ll tell you how she was brave and took
airplanes to faraway places. I’ll tell you how your Mama met your Dad and how
happy they make each other. And how your Mama is better at being the Big Sister
than anyone I know. One day you’ll be Big to someone who’s littler and you will
be like your Mama.
Although we didn’t know when you would come into the world
(or who your Dad would be!), your Mama and I have been waiting for you since we
were little girls. When we were kids, your Mama and I played out our future
grown-up lives with our Cabbage Patch Kids. We took them to the pediatrician’s
office (my bedroom) to get weighed and have their temperature taken. When it
snowed, we sent them down the stairs on cardboard box sleds at Nana and
Pop-pop’s house. We also took them outside in our version of baby carriers,
which your Mama famously named “bed bags.” We have been practicing for so long
and are ready for you to come!
I can’t wait to share all of my favorite things with you.
The best thing about aunts and uncles is that they open up a world that’s
different from the one you share with your Mama and Dad. I remember going to my
aunts’ and uncles’ houses in Pennsylvania and exploring a whole world I didn’t
know existed, one with fishing ponds, raspberry vines, goats, and barnyard
cats.
I’ll teach you about the corners of the world I’ve visited,
how to bake delicious treats from scratch, and how to make crafts with your
hands. I’ll take you camping and bike riding and canoeing. We’ll read books
together and I’ll show you how to do cartwheels and downward dogs. And you’ll
teach me about all of your favorite things. We’ll have the best time!
Yesterday I heard your heart beating loud and strong when I
went with your Mama to see the midwife. It made you so real to me! I can’t wait
to meet you in October, Tiny— we
have so many adventures ahead.
XO,
Aunt Kiki
7/11/12
Dear Tiny,
Today we heard your heartbeat at our monthly appointment and everything seems to be going great. I'm feeling really good and all of these classes are getting us excited about the third trimester!
I was reading a book on hypnobirthing tonight (which is basically a technique for me to relax and be calm during labor) and it said that, at this point, you can interact with me from the womb. The book suggested singing to you or talking to you. And what do you know, when I hummed a little and said "hi Tiny!" a few times, you started kicking!
You're 27 weeks old now and so I know you've recently been able to hear things and sense light. It's crazy to me that you can react to me and Dad now too.
Love,
Mama
Today we heard your heartbeat at our monthly appointment and everything seems to be going great. I'm feeling really good and all of these classes are getting us excited about the third trimester!
I was reading a book on hypnobirthing tonight (which is basically a technique for me to relax and be calm during labor) and it said that, at this point, you can interact with me from the womb. The book suggested singing to you or talking to you. And what do you know, when I hummed a little and said "hi Tiny!" a few times, you started kicking!
You're 27 weeks old now and so I know you've recently been able to hear things and sense light. It's crazy to me that you can react to me and Dad now too.
Love,
Mama
7/10/12
Dear Tiny,
Today Dad started a new job! I'm jealous because he's able to walk to work instead of taking a crowded subway... so lucky!
It's really weird not working at the same place but it's also kind of fun. Now when we ask each other how the day was, we have really different answers. I'm excited to introduce you to everyone at Arc90 and everyone at Etsy once you're here... you're a lucky baby to have so many cool companies in your life!
Love,
Mama
Today Dad started a new job! I'm jealous because he's able to walk to work instead of taking a crowded subway... so lucky!
It's really weird not working at the same place but it's also kind of fun. Now when we ask each other how the day was, we have really different answers. I'm excited to introduce you to everyone at Arc90 and everyone at Etsy once you're here... you're a lucky baby to have so many cool companies in your life!
Love,
Mama
7/9/12
Dear Tiny,
Today Dad and I had a meeting with someone about life insurance and it led to us making our wills online tonight. Like I said before, this stuff is important and worth it but man is it hard to do. It requires you to talk about the saddest stuff ever (one of us dying), which can really get in the way of the logic needed to make decisions about what we would want for you.
I've seen family members go through a death; when their wills are not specific (and honestly, even when they are...) everyone suffers. Fights break out among kids, siblings inherit everything and bypass spouses, feelings are hurt. Please bear in mind that one day when we aren't here anymore, the thing that we want most is for you and your siblings to mourn properly and live good lives - regardless of what our finances look like or which one of you gets my engagement ring.
This has been an expensive year for us and next year will no doubt be even more so. Money isn't everything. It's important to have a good income and good job so that you can stand on your own two feet, but honestly? Everything else is just gravy.
Love,
Mama
Today Dad and I had a meeting with someone about life insurance and it led to us making our wills online tonight. Like I said before, this stuff is important and worth it but man is it hard to do. It requires you to talk about the saddest stuff ever (one of us dying), which can really get in the way of the logic needed to make decisions about what we would want for you.
I've seen family members go through a death; when their wills are not specific (and honestly, even when they are...) everyone suffers. Fights break out among kids, siblings inherit everything and bypass spouses, feelings are hurt. Please bear in mind that one day when we aren't here anymore, the thing that we want most is for you and your siblings to mourn properly and live good lives - regardless of what our finances look like or which one of you gets my engagement ring.
This has been an expensive year for us and next year will no doubt be even more so. Money isn't everything. It's important to have a good income and good job so that you can stand on your own two feet, but honestly? Everything else is just gravy.
Love,
Mama
7/7-7/8/12
Dear Tiny,
Sorry this is two posts in one, but don't think that we haven't been thinking about you this weekend... we have had ELEVEN hours of childbirthing classes over the past two days! You are basically all we are thinking about. Well, you and the 100 degree heat.
Dad and I went to a class in Park Slope where we met 6 other couples. Their babies will be born before you (one couple is due on your due date but are expecting twins, so they will probably be early). We learned all about the different signs of labor, what to expect in the stages, how Dad can help me stay calm and comfortable, and a bunch of techniques to take with us to the Birthing Center when it's time to go. It was super-informative but I also felt like it was a great experience for Dad and I to do together. It's kind of funny being in the same room as 6 other pregnant couples... everyone was so supportive of each other and in love!
I'm feeling great about the way we're planning to labor with you (naturally). Of course we'll take things as they go and make the decisions that are best for you and me, but I'm feeling really confident about our approach. This is weird to say but I'm really kind of looking forward to labor... I think it's going to be a huge life event in itself, not to mention that we get to meet you at the end of it all!
Love,
Mama
P.S. You had this hiccups during class this morning... that was crazy!
Sorry this is two posts in one, but don't think that we haven't been thinking about you this weekend... we have had ELEVEN hours of childbirthing classes over the past two days! You are basically all we are thinking about. Well, you and the 100 degree heat.
Dad and I went to a class in Park Slope where we met 6 other couples. Their babies will be born before you (one couple is due on your due date but are expecting twins, so they will probably be early). We learned all about the different signs of labor, what to expect in the stages, how Dad can help me stay calm and comfortable, and a bunch of techniques to take with us to the Birthing Center when it's time to go. It was super-informative but I also felt like it was a great experience for Dad and I to do together. It's kind of funny being in the same room as 6 other pregnant couples... everyone was so supportive of each other and in love!
I'm feeling great about the way we're planning to labor with you (naturally). Of course we'll take things as they go and make the decisions that are best for you and me, but I'm feeling really confident about our approach. This is weird to say but I'm really kind of looking forward to labor... I think it's going to be a huge life event in itself, not to mention that we get to meet you at the end of it all!
Love,
Mama
P.S. You had this hiccups during class this morning... that was crazy!
7/6/12
Dear Tiny,
Tonight Dad and I are going on a date. We're going out to eat and then we're going to watch a French film in a park. We're making an effort to spend time together before you come... because we're not sure what our lives will be like for a while after you're here with us!
I hope you won't mind staying with other people but even if you do, it's good for you. You'll get used to having a babysitter every once in a while. It's important for me and Dad to hang out alone... after all, you want your parents to enjoy spending time with each other, right?
(Secret answer: yes. You do. It makes life so much easier.)
Love,
Mama
Tonight Dad and I are going on a date. We're going out to eat and then we're going to watch a French film in a park. We're making an effort to spend time together before you come... because we're not sure what our lives will be like for a while after you're here with us!
I hope you won't mind staying with other people but even if you do, it's good for you. You'll get used to having a babysitter every once in a while. It's important for me and Dad to hang out alone... after all, you want your parents to enjoy spending time with each other, right?
(Secret answer: yes. You do. It makes life so much easier.)
Love,
Mama
7/4/12
Dear Tiny,
Today is the 4th of July, which is a big deal in America. Dad and I spent the day relaxing, taking walks, naps and eating ice cream. I also polished off a book that I got from the library yesterday. I love having enough free time to read a book in a day!
Dad and I spent a lot of time talking about you over ice cream. We're talking over some big decisions that we have to make soon, things like circumcision and your name. Both decisions will affect you greatly in your life; both are very tough for us to make.
On the way home we stopped at the bookstore and each picked up a book of baby names. We got a bunch of new ideas and laughed at some of the names in those books. Helmut?! Beasley?! They cracked us up.
Happy 4th of July, Dawson Adolf Dary. Here's hoping we agree on something better by October!
Love,
Mama
Today is the 4th of July, which is a big deal in America. Dad and I spent the day relaxing, taking walks, naps and eating ice cream. I also polished off a book that I got from the library yesterday. I love having enough free time to read a book in a day!
Dad and I spent a lot of time talking about you over ice cream. We're talking over some big decisions that we have to make soon, things like circumcision and your name. Both decisions will affect you greatly in your life; both are very tough for us to make.
On the way home we stopped at the bookstore and each picked up a book of baby names. We got a bunch of new ideas and laughed at some of the names in those books. Helmut?! Beasley?! They cracked us up.
Happy 4th of July, Dawson Adolf Dary. Here's hoping we agree on something better by October!
Love,
Mama
7/3/12
Dear Tiny,
When I was a boy your Pop-pop and I used to do a lot of outdoor activities together. These are some of my favorite memories. Pop-pop is a really strong bike rider (I bet you he will still be riding when you're ready to learn, so we'll both take you out when you visit Nana and Pop-pop's house!) and he brought me out onto the roads for long bike rides since I was about 13 years old. I'll admit, I was pretty nervous at first, since we would ride on roads that sometimes had a lot of fast cars. I think about your Pop-pop every day now as I bike about 3 miles to work at the Environmental Protection Agency in Washington, DC. Beyond biking, your Pop-pop and I would hike (mostly to Turkey Mountain up in Yorktown), go on camping trips with Boy Scouts, ice skate on ponds in the winter, and build fires in our backyard.
I hope you'll learn to love the outdoors, Tiny. There is an amazing world out there, full of so many plants and animals...each which has its own special name! Don't be afraid to get your hands dirty. And most importantly, don't be afraid to challenge yourself in the outdoors. There will probably be a lot of distractions when you grow up; new technology, busy schedules, and the like. But don't forget to escape it all once in a while. There's nothing better than standing quietly in an open forest listening to everything around you. Pop-pop and I will be right alongside you :-)
Uncle Steve
7/2/12
Dear Tiny,
As you might expect, I have lots of female friends. I know women who are married, divorced, single... and everywhere in-between. In fact, I've been talking about boys with friends since elementary school. How mysterious (... and annoying?!) boys were! They seemed so much more susceptible to what was cool or who was popular or what their friends thought.
When I was in college I had a poignant moment with a professor in which I told him that I thought it was entirely likely that I would end up a single, old woman. It wasn't necessarily said in a bitter tone; there was something appealing about quitting the entire game of relationships and settling into a comfortable routine with a cozy sweater and a few pets to keep me company. But that professor told me to wait it out, that boys take a few more years to mature. Sure enough I eventually met Dad and that professor was happy to say he told me so when I saw him earlier this year.
I'm writing this because you're going to exist in the world as a different gender than I am. And not only that, but you're going to go through the world as the gender that I was always waiting on, always two steps ahead of, the one that was always touted as the one that made more money, had more managerial positions, more privilege, less biological clock. What would it be like to go through the world as a boy? I hardly know.
I work with many men these days. Technology still struggles to draw as many women into the industry. Some days I take the elevator to the lobby and think, "GAH. MEN!" Some days I miss the presence of a bunch of strong women around me. But you know, most days I don't think much about it at all. It's an underlying presence for sure, a culture that can't be ignored. It changes the way I talk to people or negotiate or explain my point of view. But I'm far enough into life to know that, some women? Are crazypants. And some men? Are crazytown.
Be a good person. Be an honest person. Be funny, be kind, don't let people take advantage of you, respect yourself and back up your reputation with a strong work ethic. That's good advice for you, boy or girl.
Love,
Mama
As you might expect, I have lots of female friends. I know women who are married, divorced, single... and everywhere in-between. In fact, I've been talking about boys with friends since elementary school. How mysterious (... and annoying?!) boys were! They seemed so much more susceptible to what was cool or who was popular or what their friends thought.
When I was in college I had a poignant moment with a professor in which I told him that I thought it was entirely likely that I would end up a single, old woman. It wasn't necessarily said in a bitter tone; there was something appealing about quitting the entire game of relationships and settling into a comfortable routine with a cozy sweater and a few pets to keep me company. But that professor told me to wait it out, that boys take a few more years to mature. Sure enough I eventually met Dad and that professor was happy to say he told me so when I saw him earlier this year.
I'm writing this because you're going to exist in the world as a different gender than I am. And not only that, but you're going to go through the world as the gender that I was always waiting on, always two steps ahead of, the one that was always touted as the one that made more money, had more managerial positions, more privilege, less biological clock. What would it be like to go through the world as a boy? I hardly know.
I work with many men these days. Technology still struggles to draw as many women into the industry. Some days I take the elevator to the lobby and think, "GAH. MEN!" Some days I miss the presence of a bunch of strong women around me. But you know, most days I don't think much about it at all. It's an underlying presence for sure, a culture that can't be ignored. It changes the way I talk to people or negotiate or explain my point of view. But I'm far enough into life to know that, some women? Are crazypants. And some men? Are crazytown.
Be a good person. Be an honest person. Be funny, be kind, don't let people take advantage of you, respect yourself and back up your reputation with a strong work ethic. That's good advice for you, boy or girl.
Love,
Mama
7/1/12
Dear Tiny,
I'm rewatching a show called Lost that Dad and I watched together a few years ago. Tonight I watched the episode where Claire gives birth on the island.
I am really, really glad that we're not going to be giving birth to you in the wilderness. Birthing Center, here we come!
Love,
Mama
I'm rewatching a show called Lost that Dad and I watched together a few years ago. Tonight I watched the episode where Claire gives birth on the island.
I am really, really glad that we're not going to be giving birth to you in the wilderness. Birthing Center, here we come!
Love,
Mama
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